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B-040. Incertitudinal - by Greig Clifford
Copr. Copyright © 2021 GREIG CLIFFORD.

(Relating to 'incertitude' - uncertainty, doubtfulness, insecurity)

A self portrait of sorts... not a physical one of course but rather a mental snapshot, a representation of the state of mind I sometimes find myself in, of ideas and thoughts whizzing around my head, too fleeting and utterly impossible to catch hold of for me to form into something cohesive. Mixed with the demands of life's responsibilities, it can sometimes feel like I'm surrounded by a mist of buzzing frustrations.

And doubts creep in too, as I face the effects this pandemic year of stagnation has had on my career plans. I have by necessity had to shift my focus a little... by branching out from music photography. Is it right to do that? Am I adding to the issues by diluting my 'brand'. How can I achieve my creative goals and live this life in the best way for those close to me? Am I good enough to achieve such creative goals anyway? Is my motivation strong enough to rebuild again? Should I be dedicating my time to finding a job with more stability? These types of questions wrack my mind as I face the scenario that doing what I love may not meet the responsibilities I have.

That's the rub, I suppose... responsibilities, and finding a fulfilling way to meet them that enables one to feel happy. As much as I love creative photography as a career choice, the fear of the consequences from not meeting those responsibilities... well it kind of takes away the pleasure sometimes. We all need a roof over our heads... what sacrifice to achieve that? How large a roof does one need? People who have a job they truly love doing are very lucky. We spend a long time working... is it selfish to want to be happy doing it?
I know I'm lucky to have the luxury of thinking such thoughts. I know I am lucky to be living a comparably good life, sharing it with a family who love me. I want it to continue though, and so the questions nag.

This is the burden of the self employed. The burden of the creative mind. I'm not complaining though. It is what it is. I liked that this image felt representative.

Hopefully, the image is relatable to others, and their own specific feelings too.

If this image is the first of mine you have seen, or you are relatively new to my work, please know I'm always keen to make new contacts and push my photography to wider horizons. If you like what you see, say hello!

If you are able to help bring my photography to a larger audience, then lets talk! I'd be glad to hear from you!

Finally, prints of this image are available, starting at affordable prices to encourage new collectors. Signed archival quality prints are strictly limited in number. Your support is very much appreciated.

(Published 03/04/2021)

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